It’s funny how a few words can
make you worry about something you weren’t. And it’s funny how much notice we
can take of those words if they come from someone who – whether subconsciously
or not – we think knows what they are talking about.
Miss P is a chatterbox. She has a
wide vocabulary and her pronunciation is good on the whole. She takes a lot of
notice of the world around her, giving me a running commentary – “Look Mummy,
blue car! Blue car gone now” – and is something of a parrot, repeating everything
that she hears. She tries to count, loves naming shapes and colours and
understands everything we say. She can follow instructions and ask for what she
wants.
At least all of this applies when
we are at home. Once we step out of the front door she doesn’t speak, only to
me, Rich and my parents. Not to the women in the shop that we see every day, or
the people we pass in the street all the time. She won’t speak to visitors and
apparently wouldn’t speak at playgroup. Though she really enjoys it and chatters
all the way home about what she’s been doing she wouldn’t speak to either the
teachers or the other children,
And they commented on it. They were ‘very aware’ that she hadn’t spoken in the
two sessions she’d been to, though commented on her rather freestyle form of
singing during music.
So something that up until then I
hadn’t worried about, that I had only thought about briefly and decided that
she will speak in public when she’s ready, became an issue. And I worried. And
then – like any idiotic parent – googled. And then worried some more about the
autistic spectrum traits, anxiety disorder and selective mutism results that the
Google Gods presented me with.
Off to twitter, a good friend and
a chat with people that actually know Miss P. And – apart from a valid
suggestion to get her hearing checked just in case – all came back with a
resounding “Don’t worry. Give her time. Lots of kids go through this. She’s
only just turned two and things are changing all the time!”
I dropped down to only mild
concern and a plan to up the encouragement to get her to talk to people outside
of the house. Then when I picked her up yesterday they informed me happily that
she had been much more chatty. Really? How unusual. A child taking a couple of days
to get used to changes and then getting on with it.
I know they are doing their job,
it’s a fantastic preschool and I’m very happy that she’s going. But, and this
is a big but, they don’t know her yet. They don’t know how she is at home and
where her level actually is. They were looking at the situation – not that it
was really a ‘situation’ – and judging it from what they could see. From what
they’d observed in six hours. That’s not a long time and certainly not long
enough to decide whether there’s an issue or not.
I think it’s a lesson I need to remember – I know her better than anyone. I know when it’s
time to worry and when it’s time to just shrug my shoulders and say “give it
time”.
